HUMILITY

I use to sit in meetings and they would have topic discussions and ofter humility would come up. I would always be sort of worried that they would ask me to speak when I wasn't sure what I would say on that topic. I am no longer worried but I am very embarrassed.
I was down at a restaurant and I saw a man that had lent me 320 dollars for car insurance, as though that is what I really needed it for. I never did get that insurance.
The next was an old landlord that I went out of my way to bother for money for gas.
The worst is my uncle that I love very much. I saw him down the mall and ran up to him and said hey uncle, the response that I got was as though I just kicked him. I left after a brief talk (all cold and meaningless ) and was quite upset. I thought about why he would treat me like that and wondered what I could have done then all of the sudden it dawned on me, money.
The next time I had a chance I went by his place and knocked on his door, he answered with a little bit of being glad to see me but not as he would normally. I asked him if I owed him some money and he replied yes, and that he was disappointed in me and mad. I didn't owe my uncle all that much money but it was the principle behind it.
You see we get so lost in the drugs that we forget the values of what we were taught and how we were brought up, my uncle just trusted me to pay him back or to at least acknowledge that I owed him money but I forgot because I borrowed from everybody and I couldn't keep track of who I owed money too.
I am so happy that I could pay him back today and I brought him out for breakfast and had a really good talk. I told him the truth about the drugs and he accepted my apology. I have the chance to fix any of the mistakes I made while doing drugs and I never would have if I was still using.
Please won't you give yourself a chance to live your life without the chaos of drugs, for you and your family.
I'll tell you one thing though . The embarrassment I feel when someone tells me that I owe them money now is know where in comparison to the embarrassment I felt when I would go around trying to borrow money off of everyone I know and they work just like I do.
Play your day through.... the chaos of drug use to the serenity of just being you.